How We Deny Ourselves the Love, Peace, and Joy That Should Fill Our Lives and What We Can Do About It

Share this article on social media:


The love, peace, and joy that should fill our lives is being denied to us. And we are the perpetrators of this crime. We are choosing to live with fear, anxiety, depression, unhappiness, and a sense that the world inflicts suffering on us. These sentiments form a dense shell over the feelings of love, compassion, comfort, peace, and joy that are our nature as manifestations of Our Universal Intelligence that comprises only unconditional love. To be loving, compassionate, peaceful, and joyful, we need only break the shell and cast it away. Our underlying natures will shine through.

We are spiritual beings having a temporary physical experience. We are individual manifestations of Our Universal Intelligence, which is wholly loving without conditions. However, as we developed our personalities, attitudes, and abilities in Earth School, our minds were shaped by untruths taught by society that suppress the natural love and compassion that is our nature as one with Our Universal Intelligence. We should feel peaceful, loving, and joyful regardless of our life circumstances. If we are feel agitated, unloved, and unhappy, we are creating our own misery.

These are untruths we have been taught by society:

  • Events, circumstances, and people make me feel unloved, irritated, angry, or unhappy.
  • The only way I can have a loving, peaceful, joyful life is for the people around me and events in my life to be such that I feel loved, peaceful, and joyful.
  • People around me must change their behavior so they treat me as I expect to be treated to feel loved, peaceful, and joyful.
  • I have no control over what happens to me in my life.

We make ourselves feel unloved, agitated, and unhappy during life experiences. Or, we make ourselves feel happiness, contentment, and compassion. The experiences do not create our misery or joy. We do.

People Who Took Control Over Their Unfortunate Life Circumstances

There are many examples of people who created lives filled with love, peace, and joy in the presence of adversity.

Sudha Chandran had her right leg amputated but became widely known as a Bharatanatyam dancer.

Arunima Sinha lost her left leg in an accident and went on to climb Mount Everest.

Stephen Hawking was paralyzed by ALS and spent his life in a wheelchair, unable to speak, but became a renowned theoretical physicist.

Helen Keller, visually impaired and deaf, achieved a bachelor’s degree in arts and was an inspiration to all who heard her story.

Franklin D. Roosevelt suffered a paralytic illness when he was 39 years old so he could not walk, but he went on to be president of the United States.

Ludwig Van Beethoven suffered a hearing disability at age 44, but continued composing brilliant music.

Christopher Reeve, who played Superman, became paralyzed from an accident but founded a nonprofit to enhance research into injuries of the spinal cord. He wrote, “At first, dreams seem impossible, then improbable, and eventually inevitable.”

Walt Disney suffered from dyslexia. He was fired from his first job at the Kansas City Star after his newspaper editor told him that he didn’t have enough imagination or creativity. He wrote, “It’s kind of fun to do the impossible.”

Abraham Lincoln failed in business, had a nervous breakdown, and was defeated eight times in elections before becoming president.

Albert Einstein didn’t speak at all for the first three years of his life. When he learned to speak, he would whisper what he was about to say before saying it. His family maid nicknamed him “der Depperte” (the dopey one). He rose above such negativity and became the most well-known scientist of the twentieth century.

Ben Franklin was ten years old when his parents could no longer afford to send him to school. However, financial concerns didn’t stop him from pursuing an education. He educated himself, and became the write, scientist, inventor statesman, diplomat, printer, publisher and political philosopher who was one of the foremost intellectuals who created the government of the United States of America.

Oprah Winfrey was repeatedly molested by her cousin, uncle and a family friend. She eventually ran away from home, and at age 14 gave birth to a baby boy who died shortly after birth. But her tragic past didn’t stop her from becoming an entrepreneur and celebrity with a net worth of $2.9 billion.

Anita Moorjani, author of Dying to Be Me, was diagnosed with terminal lymphoma cancer that had metastasized throughout her body. After a four-year battle with the disease, her body functions were shutting down and she went into a coma that all expected would be the end of her life. During her 30-hour comatose state, she had a near-death experience in which her deceased father told her that the stresses of her life were responsible for the cancer. She was then told that she could decide to return to her body or not. She elected to return.

When she awoke, she had complete understanding of what had caused the cancer and that she had the power to heal herself. With this change in her beliefs, in two weeks, 70 percent of the cancer completely disappeared. In five weeks all of the cancer had disappeared. She states that the reason for the cure is that she came back with an understanding that the cancer resulted from stress and conflict in her life and that we have control over healing in our bodies. Her state of mind had eliminated the cancer.

Frederick Douglass was born into slavery, violence, and separation from his parents. He escaped from slavery and learned the alphabet from the mistress of the house he lived in. When the woman’s husband put an end to the lessons, Douglass began trading bread to hungry neighborhood children who in return helped him learn how to read and write. He became the most important leader of the movement for African-Americans’ civil rights in the 19th century.

Marc Zipan was in a devastating car accident. He lost most of the use of his arms and legs. In spite of his circumstances, he became a gold-medal winning paralympic medalist in wheelchair rugby. He participated in skydiving and rock climbing. When asked if he would turn back the clock on the day of t he accident, Marc answered “No, I don’t think so. My injury has led me to opportunities and experiences and friendships I would never have had before. And it has taught me about myself. In some ways, it’s the best thing that ever happened to me.”

Kris Carr was diagnosed with a rare and incurable Stage IV cancer in her liver and lungs at age 32. Instead of succumbing to the disease, Kris attacked her cancer with a brand new nutritional lifestyle and became cancer free. She turned her experience into a series of successful self-help books and documentaries. Eventually, she launched her own wellness website, which is now followed by over 40,000 people.

Stephen King’s first novel, Carrie, was rejected by thirty publishers. He was so upset that he threw the novel in the trash. His wife fished it out and encouraged him to finish it. King’s books have now sold over 350 million copies, and Carrie has become a classic novel with many film and TV adaptations to its name.

Bethany Hamilton had her left arm bitten off by a shark at age 13 while surfing. Instead of admitting defeat, she went back to her surfboard one month later and continued to practice. Two years later, she was won first place in the Explorer Women’s Division of the NSSA National Surfing Championships.

Nick Vujicic was born without arms and legs. With the love and care that his parents gave him, he grew up embracing his disability and exploring his potential. Today, Nick is a happily married man with two healthy sons. Nick is a motivational speaker who has traveled to many countries and given talks to different audiences. He founded Attitude is Altitude ( ) in 2007, an organization that reaches out to people to inspire them. He also founded an evangelistic ministry called Life without Limbs.

Truia Pitt was caught in a grassfire and lost seven fingers, had over 200 medical procedures, and spent two gruelling years in recovery. Today, she is a humanitarian with InterPlast Australia & New Zealand, which offers life-changing surgery. Truia partners with multiple global partners as a motivational speaker. She has written several books and offers training on her online platforms. She was featured in a local TEDx talks where she narrated her story and her desire to leave. She urges people to look deep into their souls to find their life’s purpose. Turia and her husband welcomed their first son in December 2017. See a video of her story at

Sam Berns, who was featured in the documentary Life According to Sam by HBO, suffered from progeria, a condition that causes the bodies of the sufferers to age 8-10 times faster than normal. Rapidly aging symptoms include hair loss, exhaustion, joint ache, and high risk of stroke. In spite of his condition, he became a motivational speaker encouraging people to live life fully regardless of any physical disabilities. See Sam explaining his story at

Through Sam’s featured documentary, The Progeria Foundation garnered more support as people all over the world learnt about progeria. This foundation works with other progeria kids such as Lindsay and Kaylie featured on the video (6 going on to 60) by Barcroft, and again in another video that was pursuing the medical progress for the treatment of progeria. As of 2016, progeria treatment had already been developed and its effects exhibited as illustrated by Hayley’s treatment on the DOCS: Hayley – The 96 Year Old School Girl.

Malala was born to Pakistani parents. Before she was well into her teens, she had become well known for defending the right of girls in Pakistan to get an education, defying the brutal ruling government, the Taliban, which refused to allow girls to become educated. Because of her defiance she was shot in her shoulder, neck, and face, but she survived.

Today,  Malala is a humanitarian, best-selling author, former BBC Urdu blogger, and Nobel Laureate. Malala had a day named after her by the United Nations. July 12 is now Malala Day.

Lizzie Velásquez is a motivational speaker, activist, author, and YouTuber. She was born with an extremely rare congenital disease called Marfanoid–progeroid–lipodystrophy syndrome that prevents her from accumulating body fat and gaining weight. Lizzie’s parents were told, “So when I was born, it was a miracle that I came out screaming. The doctors told my parents, “We just want to warn you, expect your daughter to never be able to talk, walk, crawl, think, or do anything by herself.”

During her teenage years, she faced cyberbullying, which ultimately inspired her to take up motivational speaking. She advises people, “Use that negativity that you have in your life to make yourself better, because I guarantee you – guarantee you – you will win.”

We create our reality. We can live in a world full of misery and unhappiness, or we can live in a world filled with love, peace, and joy. We entered Earth School to learn lessons, grow in love and compassion, and be happy. Nothing impedes us from achieving those goals. Only we can stand in our way.

Join now

Become a member

Join Seek Reality Online and You will get access to our premium content